The ALL-NEW Caption Competition

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'So John, you really can't wave your hands in the air like you just don't care?'
'Dude, I'm like 263. If I raise my hands any higher than this I'll dislocate my shoulders and crap myself at the same time...'
 
SEASON FIVE: ROUND 15 RESULTS

MY LIST

1st Place: Radiation
Only the old woman behind them noticed the dog shit they had all just walked through

2nd Place: Dermot
Obama: So...this is obviously of HUGE signifigance John...who you gonna vote for? - McCain: Well...no disrespect Barack but...but i think i'm gonna...vote for me - Obama: No...no I mean...jumbo or Dermot

3rd Place: Coopz
Obama: If we use Rockets this big we can wipe out the rest of the world! - McCain: Yeah then we can flatten it, build on it and call it the United States of the American World

HER LIST

1st Place: Radiation
Only the old woman behind them noticed the dog shit they had all just walked through

2nd Place: Jamesy
'So John, you really can't wave your hands in the air like you just don't care?' - 'Dude, I'm like 263. If I raise my hands any higher than this I'll dislocate my shoulders and crap myself at the same time...'

3rd Place: CW
McCain shows Obama an old Harry Enfield Scousers routine
[I would have voted for this one myself but it took me a minute to realise which letters were missing, by which time the joke had gone]

Amazingly, Jumbo has let his early-season lead slip, Dermot has been slowly picking up points since, and today (as it was last season) Dermot and Jumbo are at the top, level for points. Who is going to win? Can Dermot hang on or will Jumbo come out all guns blazing? Is this going to turn nasty?

OR, could we see the unthinkable? If Radiation gets 12 points (two top marks) and Dermot & Jumbo are kept out of the scoring by everybody else, Radiation will make it a three-way tie and take the competition to its second ever playoff.

COME ON BOBBY, COOPZ, CW, DAR, FD1972UK, JAY, JAMESY, MART, MARUKOMU, NICK AND TIM - THIS IS YOUR WEEK TO MAKE CAPTION COMPETITION HISTORY!

WELCOME TO THE LAST WEEK OF SEASON FIVE!
 
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SEASON FIVE: FINAL ROUND (23rd November - 30th November)
Please remember to read the rules on the first page of the thread

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He'd been waiting in line all day at the central Irani barracks to see Mr. Bush.

Then, an ice-cream van drove past.
 
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The last thing everyone in the Irani barracks saw before George hopped into a plane and said "okay, bomb the fuck out of the place now".
 
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[Thinking to himself] "Okay Steve, come on, you can do this man, we've been waiting for this to happen for the last 30 years, don't let anyone know that your dream date is George W. Bush... Just keep walking slowly towards him..."
 
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Deaf and blind man in the back left standing at attention for 3 hours as Bush visits the troops in Iraq
 
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Bush: "Hey Oprah, remember that time at your place when Dr Phil got that peanut stuck in his nostril and Tom Cruise had to squeeze it out, that was so funny!"
Lady: "Erm, Mr Bush, I'm not...."
Bush: "Oh man I loved that party, hey you know what you should have another! How's the show going anyway I haven't seen it for a while?"
Lady: "Mr President, you've got me confused with...."
Bush: "Conodaleeza? I know you're not her! Hell I'm not stupid silly!"
Lady: "Okay Mr Bush, whatever.."
 
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The man standing in front of the wide eyed Jenkins felt a little nervous going to meet Bush, he noticed as he got closer that Bush was putting his arm around everyone and expecting the same in return. How was he going to do this? Seeing as he had only one deformed arm that was growing out from the middle of his stomach.
 
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The black lady wan't smiling because she was meeting the President, it was because she was after unleashing an unhuman beast of a fart, it smelled like rotten eggs with some 8 week old pinto beans and Bovril, the guys lined up behind are illustrating for us the exact moment of impact
 
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After telling him she was a big fan of bush, she couldn't bring herself to tell him that she didn't mean President Bush...
 
GLOBAL CHAOS AS JUMBO MOANS "OH NO NOT ANOTHER BUSH PIC".

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When the news broke in Washington that Jumbo was mega pissed that "yet another fucking Bush picture" was to be used in the caption competition, George W rounded the troops in anticipation for his entry. 5 days had passed since the final round had begun and all Jumbo had to offer so far was a substandard entry mocking Bush's stupidity, an angle likely to be taken by the majority... again. The mood in the camp was positive despite rumours that Chris was far too busy writing game reviews for Asian magazines than spending time finding decent pictures and so all Jumbo could come up with were ridiculously long, almost to the point of rambling entries in a desperate bid to gain some points and clinch the title.

A spokesman for Jumbo said "Shit, he's really gone and blown it now.", a response which was met with widespread criticism from within the CapComp camp (say that when you're drunk). Experts say the pressure may finally have got to Jumbo, or that maybe there's only so many times you can hear a joke about Bush being stupid before you crack.

:CRY:
 
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Not content with nearly killing Pedro Mendes, Danny Mills next project involved taking a man hostage at an army base right behind George Bush.
 
SEASON FIVE: FINAL ROUND RESULTS

MY LIST

1st Place: jaygrim
Rad's eyeballs stand to attention as Jaygrim inserts his penis into Rad's anus

2nd Place: Dermot
The man standing behind Bush, Admiral Blackfingers, decided he should tap Bush on the left shoulder to get his attention

3rd Place: Radiation
Deaf and blind man in the back left standing at attention for 3 hours as Bush visits the troops in Iraq

HER LIST

1st Place: jaygrim
Nancy in the background winner of the worlds biggest afro waits to meet Bush

2nd Place: Jamesy
After telling him she was a big fan of bush, she couldn't bring herself to tell him that she didn't mean President Bush

3rd Place: Radiation
Deaf and blind man in the back left standing at attention for 3 hours as Bush visits the troops in Iraq

-------------------------

IT'S ALL OVER! Congratulations to Dermot for snatching victory after a poor start, retaining his title for the second season in a row.

Dermot has broken three records this season:

  • The first person to retain their Caption Competition title
  • The first person to get more than 68 points in a season (72)
  • The first person to get over 200 career points (222)
But congratulations also to Jumbo who was doing so well until all of the pictures of Bush got too much (I'll try to find pictures of someone else next time), plus Jaygrim and Radiation who gave the top two a mighty scare, and Jamesy who looks to be a dark horse next time around.

Season six will begin after a short break.
Due to the credit crunch there will be no prize. :(
 
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I really liked Grims entries this week...anyways, victory comes again to the Derminator, Jumbo no doubt has my address and my families addresses and is packing the letter bomb, but that's okay, cause i have CB's adress and this is all his fault, so if anything happens to MY fam the Bauer fam goes DOWN!!!! I WON VICTORY IS MINE!!!!! IT SHOULD BE 3 IN A ROW IF NOT FOR THE CONSPIRACY THEORY. FIRST OF ALL.....I WOULD LIKE TO THANK THE CAREST OF ALL BEARS CAREBEAR, THIS ONE IS FOR YOU!!!!

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BABY, I LOVE YOU, PLEASE LETS HAVE A THREESOME ME YOU AND CHRIS WHILE HE COMPLAINS ABOUT THE RIPPLE EFFECT ON THE NETS ON FIFA 09 WHILE CW RECORDS IT.

I WANT TO THANK JUMBO, YOU DESERVE A TITLE, BUT YOU'RE USELESS AND CANT WIN ONE, BECAUSE I AM THE WINNER

I WANT TO THANK CAREBEAR, BECAUSE OF WHAT I SAID EARLIER, PLEASE LETS HAVE THAT THREESOME, WE COULD GO TO BRISTOL ME YOU AND CHRIS AND LISTEN TO T-SPOON I WANT TO HAVE SEX ON THE BEACH AND WE COULD ALL HAVE SEX

I'D LIKE TO THANK JUMBO, AGREAT COMPETITOR, BUT USELESS

I'D LIKE TO THANK CHRIS BAUER AND CAREBEAR FOR ORGANISING ALL THIS AND FANTASISING ABOUT ME WHEN THEY ARE SNUGGLING DOWN TOGETHER

I'D LIKE TO THANK CHRIS BAUER

AND CAREBEAR...

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PLEASE LET ME GIVE MY THANKS TO CHRIS DAVIES ALSO, A MAM AMONST MEN

AND LET ME THANK CW, WITHOUT HIM I WOULD BE NOBODY, CW THOUGHT ME EVERTHING THERE IS TO KNOW IN LIFE, HE IS LIKE WAX ON WAX OFF MISTER WHYAGI IN THE KARATE KIDS BUT WITH MORE INTELLIGENCE

I'D LIKE TO THANK GRIM ALSO, AND CAREBEAR AND CHRIS BAUER AND CW, I LOVE THEM ALL I WANT TO HAVE JUMBO CHRIS AND CAREBEAR AND CW AND GRIM ALL LINED UP ON A COUCH AND I GET TO WHISPER IN ALL THER EARS THEN MASSAGE THEM ALL AND THEN DO A VICTORY SPEECH THEN FEED CW A VICTORY KIT KAT PRIZE THAT I WOULD HAVE BOUGHT MYSELF CAUSE JACK BAUER IS FEELIN THE CRUNCH AND I WOULD JUST STICK IN HIS MOUTH WITH TWO FINGERS AND JUST LET THE KIT KAT MELT PARTLY IN HIS MOUTH BUT AB OUT A QUARTER OF IT IN STILL IN MY HAND, CWS JUICY RED LIPS ON IT, THE KIT KAT MELTING MY HAND, MY FINGERS HALF KIT KAT AND HALF CW'S MOUTH JUICE....SORRY I'M GOING A BIT OFF TRACK HERE, THANKS EVERYONE,

THANKS CHRIS (DAVIES)





and carebear





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I won jumbo, i fucking won
 
I'm going to kill every cute animal I see from now on so we don't have any more bribes available for the next competition.

Starting with this one...

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