"Transcript from meetings of years gone by at Konami HQ"

TanMak

TanMak

League 1
27 November 2004
South Africa
Newcastle United
A bag of lolz and many home truths

K: Welcome all, let us discuss making the new pro evo game. First of all people seem very happy with random selection match, how can we make it even better for the next pro evo?
Seabass: Get rid of it.

K: OK. right, now the lighting is pretty good in pro evo, what can we do to make it better?
Seabass: make it really bright at one end of the pitch, i want it so bright that u can't see a cross coming into the box.
K: Are you sure Seabass?
Seabass: yes. make it very bright at the left hand goal. no, make that right hand goal. And call it 'the finger of god.'

K. OK Seabass, now community mode was a great addition, the fans loved being able to keep track of their performances versus their mates - maybe we can make it even better, you know - have even more stats and stuff?
Seabass: i want it removed completely from the game.
K: are you sure Seabass? it has proved very popular with our loyal fans.
Seabass: yes. i want no trace of it to be found in this new pro evo.

K: now, it seems as though our fans really like the way they can select different components from their home and away kits to play in, ie home shirt with away socks and shorts. this makes kit clashing a thing of the past. shall we keep that in for the new pro evo?
Seabass: ermmmmm. no, revert back to the old way.

K: Hey Seabass, you know that hexagony-diamond (pentagon) thing that shows you how good a player is in key areas, shall we make that better in some way? you know, maybe make it an octagon or something?
Seabass: i know the fans do like the pentagon. i'll tell you what - replace it with a number than means nothing to anyone, ok.
K: But Seabass, we've had the pentagon in for so many years now and its a fantastic way of seeing whos better in key areas when picking your team.
Seabass: Did you not hear me? I want it replaced with a number.
K: But Seabass, that will make picking your team such a hassle. I suppose at least they can still press square and have it done automatically for them.
Seabass: Ah yes, square. Well we shall have to remove that good feature. Get rid of it, put select captain there instead.
K: You're the boss Seabass.
Seabass: Whilst you're at it, get rid of Auto Set piece taker too. That made our fans lives too easy.
K: good thinking Seabass.

K: OK, we've done a lot of hard work today so far, what else can we do.. ah yes, you know in real life in the last minute in an important game the keeper always comes up for corners to the delight of the crowd?
Seabass: Yes, you can do that in our game too.. But now that u mention it.. it should be got rid of. Get rid of it.

K, OK Seabass, lets talk about online mode. We can either make it really good or really bad. For example, did you know that in FIFA 09 you can play 10 v 10 online with virtually no lag?
Seabass: Yes, I am aware. FOOLS!
K: So what shall we do to keep up?
Seabass: Make it laggy as hell and difficult to work out how to do 2 v 2 online.
K: And shall we make it possible to play 2 v 2 online from one PS3 like you can in FIFA?
Seabass: No.

Seabass: OK, some good stuff acheived today lads. well done.
Click to expand...

source
 
Hilarious... :CONFUSE:

BTW you can do 2v2 online on one PS3, did it all weekend in fact. Player one has to 'Add User' in the match room menu.
 
Funniest thing i've read on here in a long time...lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

People need to blow the cobwebs off their sense of humour!
 
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